I feel that I never adequately gave you guys closure about my exchange year. I was going through a lot of different tough times, and ultimately, decided that being with my family and friends back home was the best decision for me. I apologize for those of you who felt that I just left you guys out of what was going on.
Between changing host families and difficulties at school, I did not feel comfortable disclosing that to the whole internet, so I decided it would be best to stop blogging when I left Belgium in February.
Now, here I am, finishing up my freshman year of college over a year later, and reflecting on how integral my time in Belgium was for me. Although I did not have the BEST YEAR EVER, I learned so much about myself and made friends that I would do anything for. Not only that, but I've still been in contact with my host family--they have continuously showered me with love even after leaving.
Belgium is a part of me. The good, the bad, the ugly---it has shaped me and given me a deep appreciation for who I am today and what I have become.
To those who are currently on exchange, I know the year is almost done for you. Enjoy every moment. Spend it in the company of the ones you love most. You will never forget the impact that your exchange year has on your life. And no matter what your experience was like, you did something most people will never do. You left the comfort of your home, and choose to be uncomfortable. Instead of staying with your high school friends, you broadened your horizons and now have friends from around the world. Cherish the blessing that this year is for you.
And for those who haven't gone on exchange, I urge you to spend some portion of your life in a new environment. Whether that be abroad or literally the town over from where you grew up, being uncomfortable is a great way to grow. You will learn so much about yourself and others when you surround yourself with new people who all have different stories.
Thank you all for avidly reading my blog. I wish you the best.
In the meantime, enjoy the last song of the installment. I am a fan of musical theater song, and this song came to mind when I think of leaving. Yes, it's referring romance, but aren't all songs these days? I'm not sure how many of you dig musical theater, but you can expand your horizons...
Isn't it crazy? It is already 2014. I know that every year we tend to say the same thing: Wow, this year went by so fast, I can't believe it's already the New Year...But still. This year I broke some of the monotony of life by taking a gap year as an exchange student in Belgium. That's pretty cool. Okay, if you are reading this, you most likely know by now that I am living in Belgium as an exchange student. If not, welcome to my blog :)
This experience has reaffirmed my interest in different languages/cultures and so I'll share with you guys an essay I wrote for a college application:
FAIS CE QUE
VOUDRAS. FAIS CE QUE VOUDRAS. This phrase had been relentlessly
spinning in my head, causing me a perpetual headache. As my French class opened
our books to one of Rabelais’s greatest works, I was intensely focused on
unraveling this 16th century French literature, but my eyes
continually glazed over the words, searching for something that I could
understand. In the midst of this confusion, these four words popped out at me,
demanding my attention. This phrase translates to, “Do what thou wilt,” which
simply means that people should be able to make decisions in their lives and
pursue their passions. Yet, when are we ever told to do what we want?
From childhood, society constantly restricts
us—telling us what to eat, how to act in public, and what to wear so that we will
fit in. I cannot recall a time that I have been told by an intelligent, highly
regarded figure to do whatever I
want—regardless of what the outcome may be. What if people decided that the
rules put in place—whether by the government, society, or from a moral
standpoint—were irrelevant? I’m not talking about a revolution, but rather a newfound
freedom: the freedom to defy society's accepted conventions, even in somewhat
minor areas as the "proper" course of sequencing after high school.
Throughout my Midwestern upbringing, I have been
directed to follow the hoard in the conventional path countless times. Be practical,
study
a subject that will train you for a "good" job and be very careful
not to swerve from this surefire path to a successful life. The
people who I respected the most—teachers, close friends, counselors—were often
the first ones to question my motivation for an AFS gap year program, insisting
that I reconsider my plans. While all I could hear was “why?” my thoughts kept
whispering “why not?” I got out of line
and swerved from the prescribed path.I
have taken Rabelais’s advice to heart, and for the first time
in my life, I can say that I am truly doing what I want to do—I am living in
Belgium for a year.
My to defy the conventions of my suburban
society has been the best decision that I’ve ever made. I took the liberty to
do exactly what I wanted to do, giving myself permission to take the
opportunity to gain fluency in another language, experience a different
culture, and build relationships with people from all around the world. During my
four months in Belgium thus far, there have been times that I have questioned
my choice, as challenging aspects of the experience include adjusting
to a new lifestyle, speaking only in French, leaving friends and family behind,
and going a whole year without peanut butter. However, I'm convinced that
overcoming these obstacles will make me stronger in the long run. More importantly,
the benefits of meeting new people, becoming fluent in French, and opening
myself up to a new culture are priceless.My gap year has also provided some unexpected benefits. For example, I
now cherish the limited time that I have to speak with loved ones back home,
for the distance has given me the opportunity to appreciate the relationships
that I previously took for granted. Likewise, before moving to Belgium, I
strongly believed that I was mature and independent, but living here has
heightened these character traits more than I thought was possible. Many years
from now, this experience will still no doubt be high on my list of
transformative experiences.All for the
very minor cost of a one year delay in "getting on with my life" and
the growth that comes from stepping out of your comfort zone in a new and
exciting culture. Something tells me that this experience will not be the only
time that I challenge society’s expectations.
Yep, that's the story of getting here and my time here so far. I felt inclined to share it for some reason...
Although the beginning of my exchange has been more difficult than I ever imagined, I am making a conscious decision to keep a positive attitude for the next months to come. As I was listening to "Pompeii" by Bastille, I realized that the lyrics actually relate a lot to my feelings here. Although my life really seemed to be falling apart at times here, thinking about my friends and family back home helped me to get through it. I am hopeful and optimistic for what is to come during the 6 months left of my exchange, and I'm thinking that 2014 will be a pretty fantastic year!
But if you close your eyes,does it almost feel like nothing changed at all?
And if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like you've been here before?
How am I gonna be an optimist about this?
How am I gonna be an optimist about this?
Oh great..I have officially become one of those bloggers that promises great things for my followers (if I even have any..) but then never follows through. It's been well over a month since my last post, so I won't try to sum up everything I have done because it is just too much.
Instead, I will write a bit about Christmas. Christmas for me has always been a time primarily about Christ, family, and tradition. Every Christmas Eve my dad makes potato soup, and then my family goes to Christmas Eve service together. Usually, we open one present on Christmas Eve, and when we were younger, we'd read the Polar Express as we anxiously awaited Santa's arrival.
Christmas morning, "Santa" leaves our stockings at our doors, and then we wake up to see what he brought. As we got older, Santa kinda disappeared and we just opened the presents under the tree. Then, Christmas afternoon, we always go to see a movie together.
It's easy to overlook these traditions or times with family when you do it every year. But because I was away from home for Christmas, I thought a lot more about these things that make Christmas feel like Christmas.
Besides the Christmas traditions I have with my family, these are the things that make me feel the "Christmas spirit."
Playing/singing Christmas music in band and choir starting in October
Hearing Christmas Carols playing everywhere starting on Black Friday
The Christmas decorations that are completely over the top
The craziness in the stores in December
The smell of pine and cinnamon
Baking Christmas cookies
Elf, A Christmas Story, and the 25 days of Christmas on ABC
Santa
Snow/having a white Christmas
These are just some of the things that I think of when I think of Christmas that I didn't have or experience here. But, there are some traditions and things that I got to experience here that I will distinctly remember as my Belgian Christmas.
Saint Nicolas-He brings little candies and puts them into the kids' shoes starting in November. Then, on the night of December 5th, he brings candy and presents for the kids like Santa would for us.
Exams-Here the exams started on December 6th. There is one exam a day for about a week and a half, and you usually have four hours to take the exam. So, that means that you have the whole afternoon off to "study." Essentially, for me, my break started on December 6th, and I don't start school again until January 6th :) I even passed all of my exams except for French, wooh!
Liègeois Traditions (strictly done in the areas near Liège)
Making Broquettes on Christmas-Broquettes are kind of like a mix between crepes and pancakes. They are bigger than pancakes, and usually have raisins inside, and are sprinkled with brown sugar on top.
Another Liègeois tradition is to leave your wallet, a slice of bread, and a cup of water outside on the windowsill on the night of Christmas Eve. This is supposed to give you enough money, food, and drinks to last for the whole year. Then, they let the piece of bread dry, wrap it up in foil, and keep it until the next Christmas Eve. I thought it was a pretty funny tradition :)
Saint Nicolas and Père Fouettard (Father Whipper)--He's the mean one who will apparently come to whip the kids and leave them coal if they are bad.
The tradition of dressing up in a decorated lab coat and begging for money with a beer mug for Saint Nicolas is something unique I'll always remember. They even throw flour at the other students at school who don't give us money.
Last week we didn't have school, so Veronica came over on Monday to sleepover. We met in Liege, but she ended up taking the wrong train by accident, so I kinda wondered around Liege for a while in the meantime and did some grocery shopping. I bought what we needed for later because we decided to do a little bit of baking--Chocolate chip cookies and banana bread!
Here are some photos from our sleepover...
Belgian sleepovers--they use cots!
We weren't sure if we put the cot up right..
Veronica's hands after cutting all the chocolate
The chocolate after cutting it...it was more chunks than chips
The cookie dough was pretty tasty
A candid photo of me drying the dishes
Our cookies baking in the oven
For some reason, I forgot to take a photo of the final outcome. Although they didn't taste exactly the same as in the US and didn't look that great, they were actually quite good. I think with our resources, we did great :) We also made banana bread which came out perfectly despite the fact that I've never made it in my life. Wooh!
Place St. Lambert in Liege as we waited for the bus
Hey, it's us!
Lol, creeping on Belgian skateboarders..they attempted to be so punk
The best times I've had here so far in Belgium have all
been with exchange students. All exchange students share something in
common automatically before they even talk. We all are crazy enough to
leave our families and friends behind for an extended period of
time--most of us for a year--to live in a foreign country. We have to
make all new friends, build a relationship with our host family, change
our normal habits, and live a completely different life.
To be honest, sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision by coming here and defering college for a year. My friends back home already have their new college friends and lives, but here, it's hard to make friends. Everyone has a "group" and they've all been in the same class for a few years. It's also mostly frustating because I never really know what to say because of my French speaking abilities and just because I don't know people really well.
Let's just say, this last Monday was not at all my day. It was probably the hardest day I've had here so far. I honestly think that I'm depressed because I don't go out much, and I don't have close friends. Back in the US, I was always so busy with school and activities after school that I never had enough time to do what I needed to do, and stress was just a normal part of life for me. Here, it's the opposite. I never have anything to do. Long story short, I started crying at the dinner table because all of the feelings that have just been boiling inside of me. I'm doing a bit better now, but it's still not awesome.
I don't want to be a complete downer about this whole experience, and I'm really trying to stay optimistic. They always say that the first few months are really hard--and they aren't lying. I don't want to hide the moments that aren't as great because that would paint a false picture that my exchange is all fun and happy. That's not at all the case. As much as I'd love to say this has been the time of my life, I can't say that yet. But, it's only been about 2 and a half months...I still have 8 left. Everyone keeps telling me that it will get better, and I sure hope that they are right.
The thing is that now I really appreciate my friends back home so much more. There are all the little inside jokes and the things that are too hard to put into words that make us really close. Shout out to you guys! Love you all! Thanks for being there for me because I know that you really care.
I chose "After The Storm" by Mumford and Sons for a few reasons.
1. Mumford and Sons is probably my favorite band of all time.
2. I find that Mumford's songs fit for any mood I'm feeling. I can be angry, sad, reflective, ecstatic, and somehow, I find that I can still listen to all their songs and relate to them.
3. This song in particular basically says that times may be really hard now, but don't worry because soon enough there will be "no more tears"
Please indulge in some Mumford and Sons. Take it all in.
To all of you out there reading my blog, thank you so much! I'm sorry for my lack of posting, but I'm gonna try to do it a bit more regularly--more toward once a week if I can.
October has always been my favorite month of the year. To me, fall is the best month of the year because the weather is comfortably between warm and cold, and it is sweater weather. In Belgium, September was a lot chillier than I was used to in Ohio, but the weather this October has been about the same as Ohio. To me, fall means marching band, chilly nights, bonfires, pumpkins, changing leaves, apple picking, hay rides, apple cider, and Halloween. Here in Belgium, most of those things don't exist. The worst is that pumpkin flavored things are nonexistent. A Pumpkin Spice Latte sounds so good right now...Pumpkin pie too..It should be a crime because Belgians really don't know what they are missing out on (especially pumpkin pie).
This weekend, I went to Namur and met up with 4 other Americans with AFS. It was really awesome to finally get together, and we went to the Citadelle (the battle site of some war that happened in Belgium). Here are some pictures:
Shameless selfie
I also went to church today with my friend Laura from Costa Rica, which was good because I have only went to church once before that since I've been here. We're planning on going to the Jeremy Camp concert together in Brussels in November, which should be pretty cool. One more week of school and then we have a week off :) Yay for the Belgians having more breaks than in the US!
Happy October to all! In the mean time, I'll be trying to find something pumpkin flavored in Belgium...
YAY! I'm doing a happy dance because I got invited to hang out with Belgians! REAL LIVE BELGIANS! At school, it's slowly but sure becoming easier to talk with people, especially when I remind myself that they are just people. I am a person, they are people...they just happen to be french-speaking people. I by no means would classify myself as having close friends yet, but I have started eating lunch with this guy from my class and his friends (who are in the same grade, but not the same class). They have been really nice, and one of the girls invited me to sleepover her house this weekend with the other people we eat with :)
I'm so excited! It sounds so silly, but it really is difficult to make friends. Don't get me wrong--people haven't been mean or anything--it's just that most of them wait for you to make the first effort. This week I started to initiate conversation more, and it has made a big difference. People aren't scared to talk to me, but they are a bit reluctant (mostly because of my knowledge of French not being spectacular). I'm not an extremely outgoing person, but I've had lots of opportunities to make new friends at summer camps and stuff, and I always find a good group of people I get along well with. But the language barrier makes it harder, and plus, I haven't known this group of people for that long, so it's hard to gauge exactly who is more similar to me, etc. Nonetheless, the group of people I eat with was so nice to invite me to the sleepover, and I'm happy.
Yesterday afternoon, I went to Liege to meet about with all the other exchange students. A ton of exchange students living in Belgian meet up at this one bar in Liege every Wednesday, so it's nice to go every once in a while to meet new people who speak English, and are going through the same things as you are. Unfortunately, I lost my coat there...People kinda pile all their bags and coats in a pile in the back of the bar, and it is usually only the exchange students who are there, but yesterday there were a few Belgians, and I'm pretty sure they stole it..A few other exchange students said that they had things stolen as well..it's unfortunate, but luckily I didn't have anything in the pockets of my coat.
I am seriously starting to hate myself for making the songs I post so extremely obvious and trite, but I can't stop myself. When I think about the main idea of the post, I think about friends...Therefore, the song in Toy Story automatically comes to mind. Too bad. I do what I want...no one is forcing you to listen to it :)
So, my life here in Belgium has pretty much become "normal" for me, so I haven't been posting recently. After thinking about what to make this post about, I realized I haven't yet made a post about the differences between Belgium and the US. I haven't had any major culture shock but there are definitely things that are stereotypically Belgian.
Here is a list of everything I've noticed so far:
FOOD:
At school, everyone brings a snack to bring for our first break (around 10am) which is either a fruit or cookies (usually cookies).
Instead of having a small sandwich, a yogurt, a veggie, and a fruit (or a few things to eat for lunch) the Belgians just bring a big sandwich ("une tartine") or two...or they go across the street to buy a sandwich...which is HUGE. Like almost a whole baguette for one person!
There is no form of "nutrition bars" here in Belgium. Instead of eating a granola bar for a snack, they eat cookies.
There are like 2 aisles just for cookies in the grocery store.
Our stash of cookies and chocolate--it is a whole cabinet worth!
How is every Belgian not obese??? Like really, they really eat cookies/chocolate/waffles/fries all the time!
Belgian chocolates
Belgium is know for their beer, fries, and waffles. I don't drink, but I got to say the waffles are just so delicious. YUM.
One of the best things I've ever eaten in my life. SO GOOD.
Bread. Bread in the morning, bread with lunch, and bread (frequently) with dinner. Carbs. All the time.
This is just my host family, but we eat pasta a lot and we never really eat vegetables. I miss my healthy ways :(
Everything is measured in ml instead of oz., the whole measuring this is pretty confusing..
Milk is in a box, and it is often not refridgerated
A picture of me with Belgian Nutella--which is classier because it is in a glass jar instead of plastic.
OTHER THINGS:
Americans are just messed up because they use pounds, feet, miles, Fahrenheit, and it is just too much to do all these conversions.
Everything in Belgium is pretty much smaller--the cars, the houses, the TV(s), the streets, the stores..you get my point.
My cute and very little room in Belgium.
My house in Belgium.
Belgians are pretty conscious about saving energy/being eco-friendly..Everyone recycles and has a compost, but I still don't understand why they use plastic water bottles to bring to places. You'd think they'd catch on to refillable waterbottles...Also, they always turn off the lights when they leave a room, and they don't use a lot of water when brushing teeth/showering/washing dishes, etc.
They have virtually no red lights, and instead have roundabouts EVERYWHERE. Talk about getting carsick
It is very normal to take the bus all the time. I take it to and from school, and unlike the US, it is commonly used and very useful. Alos, taking trains is common.
Most families only have one car.
In Belgium, 30 minutes in the car is considered to be far away...It is only about an hour by train to go to Brussels, but a lot of people in my class haven't ever been there (and most of them don't ever go to the other side of Belgium).
T.V. has french version of American shows that just aren't as good...So far I've seen something similar to "What Not to Wear", "Four Weddings", and there is "Belgium's Got Talent."
They dub a lot of American movies and shows, but I can't stand that the lips are not the same as the words.
There are a lot of American music on the radio, but there are also a decent amount of Belgian/french songs too.
You can drive 5 minutes away from a city and find cows and horses. I find this pretty hilarious.
Belgians don't really work out. I go to Zumba, but it has been hard to find a place nearby where I can exercise. Americans are definitely more athletic.
SCHOOL
Everyone dresses SO NICELY. No joke--the girls always dress nicer than the teachers. They wear high heels, and always are re-applying makeup, etc.The teachers can wear jeans and stuff though.. I unfortunately do not have enough clothes/money to dress like the Belgians..Oh, how I miss my sweats and thrift store clothes...I really wonder how much time it takes people to get ready in the morning.
My school starts at 8:20am and goes until 4:15pm most days...Wednesday school ends at 12:45pm, and Tuesday, I have to stay until 5:05pm :(
In the morning and after breaks/lunch, your class has to line up to wait for your teacher to "pick you up" to lead you to class. It seems very elementary to me, but I guess it's just different.
At most schools, you have to go outside between classes because the classes are all in different buildings.
Everyone either has one 2-3" binder to put their stuff in for all their classes, or 2 or three smaller ones..Also, there are no textbooks or any other required materials for classes.
There are no lockers. You carry your binder with you wherever you go.
Girls carry around huge designer purses to hold their binder/thinks. No girls wear backpacks. Guys wear backpacks, but they are really small. Nothing like the heavy duty American backpacks.
Even if it's really hot outside (which doesn't happen in Belgium), you DO NOT wear shorts to school. You always wear pants.
There is virtually no homework. Sometimes, there will be a few easy math problems, or a vocab sheet, but it is easy. Their "tests" are what would be considered a pop quiz in the US. Everyone studies all the time, but it is really, really easy compared to the US.
There aren't school related activites (sports, band, choir, musicals, etc). If you want to do any activities, you have to find a time to do them after school, usually on Wednesday afternoon. I definitely like the way America does it better.
There are a million things that I left out I'm sure, but for now this gives you a little bit of an idea into how life is different for me here in Belgium.
