How am I gonna be an optimist about this?

Isn't it crazy? It is already 2014. I know that every year we tend to say the same thing: Wow, this year went by so fast, I can't believe it's already the New Year...But still. This year I broke some of the monotony of life by taking a gap year as an exchange student in Belgium. That's pretty cool. Okay, if you are reading this, you most likely know by now that I am living in Belgium as an exchange student. If not, welcome to my blog :)

This experience has reaffirmed my interest in different languages/cultures and so I'll share with you guys an essay I wrote for a college application:

FAIS CE QUE VOUDRAS. FAIS CE QUE VOUDRAS. This phrase had been relentlessly spinning in my head, causing me a perpetual headache. As my French class opened our books to one of Rabelais’s greatest works, I was intensely focused on unraveling this 16^th century French literature, but my eyes continually glazed over the words, searching for something that I could understand. In the midst of this confusion, these four words popped out at me, demanding my attention. This phrase translates to, “Do what thou wilt,” which simply means that people should be able to make decisions in their lives and pursue their passions. Yet, when are we ever told to do what we want?

From childhood, society constantly restricts us—telling us what to eat, how to act in public, and what to wear so that we will fit in. I cannot recall a time that I have been told by an intelligent, highly regarded figure to do whatever I want—regardless of what the outcome may be. What if people decided that the rules put in place—whether by the government, society, or from a moral standpoint—were irrelevant? I’m not talking about a revolution, but rather a newfound freedom: the freedom to defy society's accepted conventions, even in somewhat minor areas as the "proper" course of sequencing after high school.

Throughout my Midwestern upbringing, I have been directed to follow the hoard in the conventional path countless times. Be practical, study a subject that will train you for a "good" job and be very careful not to swerve from this surefire path to a successful life. The people who I respected the most—teachers, close friends, counselors—were often the first ones to question my motivation for an AFS gap year program, insisting that I reconsider my plans. While all I could hear was “why?” my thoughts kept whispering “why not?”  I got out of line and swerved from the prescribed path.  I have taken Rabelais’s advice to heart, and for the first time in my life, I can say that I am truly doing what I want to do—I am living in Belgium for a year.

My to defy the conventions of my suburban society has been the best decision that I’ve ever made. I took the liberty to do exactly what I wanted to do, giving myself permission to take the opportunity to gain fluency in another language, experience a different culture, and build relationships with people from all around the world. During my four months in Belgium thus far, there have been times that I have questioned my choice, as challenging aspects of the experience include adjusting to a new lifestyle, speaking only in French, leaving friends and family behind, and going a whole year without peanut butter. However, I'm convinced that overcoming these obstacles will make me stronger in the long run. More importantly, the benefits of meeting new people, becoming fluent in French, and opening myself up to a new culture are priceless.  My gap year has also provided some unexpected benefits. For example, I now cherish the limited time that I have to speak with loved ones back home, for the distance has given me the opportunity to appreciate the relationships that I previously took for granted. Likewise, before moving to Belgium, I strongly believed that I was mature and independent, but living here has heightened these character traits more than I thought was possible. Many years from now, this experience will still no doubt be high on my list of transformative experiences.  All for the very minor cost of a one year delay in "getting on with my life" and the growth that comes from stepping out of your comfort zone in a new and exciting culture. Something tells me that this experience will not be the only time that I challenge society’s expectations.

Yep, that's the story of getting here and my time here so far. I felt inclined to share it for some reason...

Although the beginning of my exchange has been more difficult than I ever imagined, I am making a conscious decision to keep a positive attitude for the next months to come. As I was listening to "Pompeii" by Bastille, I realized that the lyrics actually relate a lot to my feelings here. Although my life really seemed to be falling apart at times here, thinking about my friends and family back home helped me to get through it. I am hopeful and optimistic for what is to come during the 6 months left of my exchange, and I'm thinking that 2014 will be a pretty fantastic year!

  

But if you close your eyes,does it almost feel like nothing changed at all?

And if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like you've been here before?
How am I gonna be an optimist about this?
How am I gonna be an optimist about this?

 Bonne Année à tout le monde!!!

Catherine